Tuesday, feb 24th 11:39 pm.

Today i woke up at around 12:06. My friend woke up around 9:40. I was so tired, i am not sure what time i went to bed. Most likely around 2 am because i got tired early. When i woke up my friend asked if i wanted leftover alfredo, i said no because i was still cuddled into my blankets. They came back with pizza and turned on the lights so i got up more, i was still rotted though. Once i checked my messages, i found out that my boyfriends frog had died. It made me extremely sad, he said the frog was normal for most of the morning. He had a pacman frog, i searched up pacman frogs and apparently they are known for having a lot of health issues? i don’t know much about frogs at all. After that, i went to go heat up the alfredo, i got a massive plate of it. it was the leftovers of yesterdays dinner, which was ribs and alfredo.

I showed my boyfriend that image with hopes he would get weird about it, it did not really work. He said “this looks so good”. I know he is into these things as well, but i am the person who got him into it. Unintentionally though. Maybe he was just tired, or i did not make him excited enough about it. I guess i don’t care, but i am very disappointed about it. A few weeks ago, he got really into it. It was frosting, he made me eat half an entire bowl of it. Right before that he was saying he was horny so maybe it only affects him when he is already in the mood. I doubt he likes it as much as i do so that also most likely adds to it a lot. My stomach hurts.

I have a big feeder fetish. Or maybe a food fetish. Feederism. My friend saw that as i was writing it. I am not embarrassed. I am not sure what the correct terms are for it, i am not big into the weight gain aspect but when i search food fetish i see sexy pizza. Alfred from hetalia gave me that in june-july of 2025. I have a very specific image that i like. That is something i am embarrassed of. I told my friend, who i am with at the moment, about it a month ago i think. I feel less ashamed. Before, it was a secret my boyfriend would use and tease me with. That was hot.

I am not sure what i did after eating, me and my friend were watching drag race so we most likely just kept watching shows. I think we watched criminal minds after. She has gotten me into criminal minds a bit, i like Gideon. He is cute. She loves criminal minds a lot, she said it is her favorite next to one piece. I feel like she likes one piece more, her room is covered in things relating to one piece, not criminal minds. My friend thinks everything i do is a joke, i want to kill her. That part.

Wednesday, feb 25th 3:08 pm.

I got up very late, around 1:30 maybe. I slept bad, i kept waking up and falling back asleep to hyper realistic dreams that made me panic. I have been drawing since i woke up, and i just began charging my phone. I had a dream that my friend woke me up and told me it was 3:30 and we had to get up so we could go to get her new glasses and froyo.. i fell back asleep.. and then actually woke up in a panic asking her little sister what time it was.. she said it was 11. I went back to sleep. We have to get ready to actually go do those things soon, we have to go at 4. There is this tiktok account thats username is “imeshinuma”, i am following them. I want to be friends with them a lot. They only post things about the manga meshinuma. I want to buy it. I see single chapters being sold for 16-15 dollars.. i don’t think i have the money to buy all of them.. i would try to place some on hold at the library, but that feels too humiliating. Especially because it takes me a while to get through any book, so if i had like 5 of them i would have to recheck them in person face to face with someone i see a lot……

It is 3:20 right now, me and my friend have to get ready soon. I dont know what to wear, i barely took any clothes with me over here… i thought i took a lot but i guess not… It is fine though. I think i will just wear this black shirt and my jeans.

We came back from froyo and glasses an hour ago or so. I got plain tart, popping boba, and a seasonal flavor “raspberry chocolate truffle”? I had a yogurtland gift card but my friends dad didnt let me use it.. he told me to save it. I am happy though because now i still have money if i want to get some alone. They got separate extra cups lol.

My boyfriend called us and we found out that he can go with his brother and brothers mom in may to california for fanime. My other friend, cherry, might be going as well. We will have a large group if everyone goes, 5 people. I am going to be chocola from nekopara.. her volume 4 outfit. I was thinking i could just wear her black outfit one but the volume 4 outfit is pink and has longer sleeves! i don’t like showing my arms in dresses very much.. and the only website that has her costume and is trusted is high quality which is even nicer. I think it comes with her thigh highs, but they will likely be low quality and slip off easily as i am chubby so i might buy separate white ones… i wanted to do that before i even knew it came with some.

Me and my friend are watching drag race at the moment, vita is dead meat. We are going to watch my favorite show ever in chronological order and kane pixels backrooms. I am so excited for the backrooms movie coming out, it is going to be in theaters may 29th so me and my other friends and boyfriend can watch it after con!!!! Mark duplass will be in it, he is so hot. I love creep.. We are going to watch backrooms first once we are finished with drag race. I want taco bell really bad, i have a craving for it, my boyfriend said i should get 2 grilled cheese burritos, a large nacho fry, and a baja blast which is awesome.